At times, however, it can become easy to overlook and forget about this never-failing support from Him. Getting wrapped up in all of the daily tracking, charting, appointments... and hoping, wishing, watching for any sign that this month might be the month can quickly consume all of you. It's easy in those happy celebratory moments to thank God for the victory, but it's during those most difficult, disappointing instances when your true faith is tested.
Now don't get me wrong, having this faith and trust in God doesn't make any of this easy by any means, because it's still not easy. In fact, it's probably one of the most difficult things that I've been through in my life thus far. But what my faith does do is make it possible for me to continue to get through these trials.
There have been plenty of times that I've questioned God and His plan, been frustrated with it since it clearly isn't aligned with my plan, and even been times when I've been flat out angry and livid with what He's allowing me to go through. But ultimately, I'm still somehow always able to come back to a place of peace knowing that no matter what, and no matter how mad I get at Him, He's still always by my side in all of it. No matter what I do, or how angry I get at Him (or how many times I inappropriately yell, scream, and even mildly curse at Him -- yes, I've done this and am not proud), His grace and love still have the ability to ultimately overcome. And that's what's amazing about Him. No matter what we do, no matter how we sin, no matter how many times we turn away from Him and try to take matters into our own hands... through our trusting in Jesus, He is still always there for us, with open arms - when we are ready to come back. He never leaves us (even when we try to push Him away -- again, I know this from personal experience), and His love and unfailing grace are everlasting.
Putting my faith and trust in Jesus has been the best and most amazing decision I've made in my life. Coming to know Him and His love for me has definitely transformed my life in countless ways... including helping me get through this craziness of infertility. In the end, I know God has a plan in all of this, and through it all is working to bring His plan into fruition.
Why is He allowing us to go through? Why have we been chosen to live this struggle? Where will this all go in the end? What will the ultimate outcome be?... To be honest, I can't say for sure. Because at this point, only He knows. But what I can say for sure is that God's hand is in it... and ultimately His plan will prevail.
I hold on strong to my faith that through God, all things are possible. It is possible for me to get pregnant. It is possible for us to have a baby (and hopefully two, or three, or however many God has planned for us). It is possible and I believe it will happen - in due time. In His time, not necessarily mine... so while I wait, what I'm called to do is to continue to have faith. Faith in the child/ children I know God has planned for us. Faith in the pregnancy I know I will experience. Faith in my amazing God.
I know He wants great things for me (and my husband... and all of us that trust in Jesus), so no matter how rough the road gets, I have to continue to fall back on this promise from Him...
"For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord. They are plans for good and not evil, to give you a future and a hope."
~Jeremiah 29:11~
~Jeremiah 29:11~
It sounds like you are in a really good place right now! Yay! I know getting there is not the easiest. He will be faithful in his promise for a good life and future for you.
ReplyDeleteThinking of you and praying for you always!
Thank you so much! Yes, I'm definitely in a good place now, so hoping to stay in that good place :) And thank you so much for your prayers, they are soooo appreciated! Praying for you as well dear!
ReplyDeleteTiffanie,
ReplyDeleteHi! It's Rebekah from Barren to Beautiful, thought I would check out your blog! I love how you said, "What I can say for sure is that God's hand is in it... and ultimately His plan will prevail." SO true. Keep believing that (maybe even write it on a sticky note, or somewhere you will see it often, so you remember!) May God keep leading your focus to Him, even when you can't see the plan at all! Much love, xo, Rebekah
Hi Rebekah! Thanks so much for stopping by and checking out my blog! It's still in its infancy stage, but slowly coming along :) And thank you so much for your kind comments and great idea about writing that thought on a sticky note, I think I definitely will because it can become easy to forget in those difficult moments. Thank you so much for your encouragements, I truly appreciate it! xoxo
DeleteI am so proud of the woman of faith you have become!!! God truly has a plan & purpose for you & Alex!!
ReplyDeleteThank you! :) Gotta keep holding on to that faith, it's usually the only thing that gets me (us) through all of this!
DeleteFrom You Version Covenant Keeping God devotional:
ReplyDeleteGod Who Turns Around Circumstances
The threatening situation had not only passed by but the person, who was the source of the threat and fear had now returned home, no more as an enemy to Jacob.
The Lord intervened and the difficult and wounding issues between Jacob and Laban had now been set aside. Both of them were able to discuss matters with a positive frame of mind. This was once again the intervention of God. They agreed and set up structures and methods to ensure that they would not harm each other. Laban also ensured that Jacob would be good to his two daughters and their children. All of these developments tell us that because of the Lord, what began as an ominous matter had now turned around completely to be a pleasant one.
Is this not how God deals in our lives? Very often we go to God to take away the threat and fear but God’s ways are far higher than ours. God is telling us, “My child trust me, this matter that seems so threatening to you will end very positively and favourable for you”
Is it not our responsibility then to trust Him and wait on the Lord? The tragedy is that many Christians do not wait on the Lord to sort out matters. Instead, we take matters into their own hands or else we rush to the people of the world for help. This is God’s warning for us to remain trusting and waiting on Him.
Will you rest in the Lord, always?
Lord teach me to rest and wait on you.
Thank you for that inspirational message! So true and a great reminder to just continue to "trust Him" no matter what.
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